To Hope Or Not To Hope

I find myself at a crossroads. I want someone in my life. I don't want to subject my kids to a stepfather, or worse, another man who may or may not be there forever. I can't compartmentalize my entire life. That would be fair to no one at all. The kids deserve a real father figure in their lives. And not this 'part-time' joint custody bullshit that our society has come to accept as 'just